14 going on 5
by conversecrazed
Summary: What do you get when you mix four idiotic pranksters, six weirdos, strict teachers, a magic school, detention, witty comment, good food, and Quidditch? This story The kids are 14 but they are turning 5 tho i don't think that many 5 year olds no cuss words
1. Chapter 1 Meeting the Boys

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Harry Potter that is owned by Ms. JK Rowling. I only own the plot and the characters I made up ( Jen, Bridget, Nadia, Sam, and Tori.) By the way, Jen is based on me and Bridget is based on Hurricane Rachel. The peoples I made up are based on real people.

"Shut up Bee" said a raven haired girl. She was asian and had catlike black eyes. She was the second tallest in the group. She was wearing black skinny jeans, red high top converse, a black pull over hoodie with the word converse on it and her black hair was down to her shoulders while her side bangs were in her eyes. She was pulling a black denim suit case. Her name was Jen. She was the sarcastic and pessimistic one.

"But I didn't say anything." said a brown headed girl. Her hair was down to her shoulders and her side bangs were hardly noticeable. She had brown eyes, pretty pale skin and was pretty tall. She was wearing a burgundy jacket with a red t shirt on, with dark blue jeans and her trusty sneakers. She was pulling a brown suitcase. Her name was Bridget, Bee for short, and she was the immature one. She and Jen were partners at everything they did especially pranks and making fun of people.

"I could just tell you were going to say something idiotic so i said it in advance." Jen said with a wicked grin. Bee was glaring at her but couldn't keep a straight face for long and they both doubled over laughing at the same time.

"You guys are sooo childish." said Nadia and Tori. Nadia, Anastasia was her real name, was the rich one in the group though she never showed it. She was always nagging on people to get school supplies and she has a wicked sense when it came to grammar! Her skin was a caramel color and her eyes were big and brown. She was the second shortest in the group and the kindest. Her hair was pulled into a tight ponytail although her hair was the prettiest. She was wearing a brown Abrocrombie pull over hoodie with dark black jeans and black flats while pulling a Louis Vuitton suit case.

Victoria, Tori for short, was the smartest in our group. She was a frickin genius. Her skin was a little litter than Nadia's and she had dark brown eyes. Her hair was down to her waist. She pulled it up in a low ponytail and her side bangs were clipped up. She was wearing a pink Aeropostle jacket with grey skinny jeans with a line going through the middle of the jeans and wearing flip flops while pulling a pink suitcase. She was bitchy at times and loved hanging out with Bee.

"No we are not." Jen said snottily while at the same time Bee said, "Why thank you....." She got side tracked by seeing a candy store.

"OHHH loook a loolliiiii pop!!" Bee said like a little kid.

"CHARGE!" Stephanie said. Steph was the perfectionist of the group and the one who liked to mimic other languages though she failed miserably. She had light brown hair down to her shoulders and her side bangs were pinned up. She was wearing her orange Hollister jacket with light jeans and orange flip flops while pulling an orange suitcase. Her eyes were a hazel and she was the tallest in the group.

"Idiotic stupid moronic bitches." Jen said with a sigh.

"Ohhh you just said the B word." Samantha said with a gasp. Sam was the goody 2 shoes of the group. She was the one who reprimanded Bee and Jen when they got out of line. They thought she was annoying but loved her all the same. She was the shortest of the group and the most athletic. Her skin was a light caramel color and had black eyes. She was wearing a teal shirt with narrow jeans and Juicy converse while pulling a blue suitcase. She was the sweetest and was sometimes acted like their older sister.

"Someone say my name?" Bee said with a smile.

"Yah B for bitches" Jen said with a smirk.

"Y thank you." Bee retorted and absently smacked Jen in the arm. Jen glared and before she could respond or hit Bee Nadia interrupted.

"I think we're lost." Nadia said worriedly.

"We're never lost. I'm leading remember?" Bee said with a cocky smile.

"We're lost and all hope is gone!! Bee is leading!!!!!" Jen said dramatically.

"WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!" Tori yelled. Bee's smile faded and stared at both of them before saying, "stop being drama queens it's my job and lets go ask those hobo's if they know where we are." Bee said pointing to 4 guys walking opposite from them.

"HEEYYYYY HOOOBBBBOOOS!! Come here you!" She called out to them.

"Us?" The guys said confusedly.

"No the guys behind you." Jen said sarcastically. The hobos didn't get the sarcasm and said, "oh okay." They paused and looked around them and realized no one was behind them.

"Wait there's no one behind us." Said a hobo.

"NOOO DUI HOBOS!!" Jen said loudly thinking they were dumb.

"We ain't no hobos."

"See they have no education they must be hobos." Said Tori in a I know everything voice.

"We have capes how can we be hobos?" The guys asked confused.

"Tori be more nicer they have feelings." Sam said.

"Unlike Jen." mumbled Jen. Unfortunately everyone heard.

"That's not nice, Jen has feelings too." Sam said looking at Bee disapprovingly.

"Yah Bitch." Jen said to Bee with a victorious smile.

"Watch your mouth!" Sam yelled at Jen.

"Good Two Shoes." mumbled Steph.

"I AM NOT!!" Sam said hotly and she got so mad she threw a temper tandrum.

"Look what you did! Now we have to wait till her highness calms down before we move any further." Bee said annoyed.

The hobos really didn't have time to take this so they cleared their throats.

"Need some cough-drops?" Jen asked coldly.

"Oh can I have some? The cherry ones taste soo good!!" Bee said excitedly.

"Oh shut up Bee." Jen said annoyed.

"Hello?" One of the hobos asked. Jen's temper broke.

"NEED THE COUGH DROPS??!!!!" Jen yelled at them.

"no.." the hobo said.

"THEN GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FACE.!!" Jen said hotly.

"mouth." Sam said.

"Yes mom." Jen said dripping with sarcasm.

"Well we're just gonna leavvvveee if you don't need our help." The hobo said and the group started to leave.

"NOO Wait!!" Tori yelled.

"Please." Sam whined.

"oh yeah. Jen got us lost so we need you guys' help." Bee said telling a complete lie.

"What!?" Jen asked. Bee then absently slapped Jen in the face.

"IT is ONNNN!!!" Jen said to Bee and Bee turned towards her both getting ready to hit each other.

"okay Break it up break it up!!" Sam said coming in between them.

"Okkkayyy then bye." The hobos started to walk away. They were in a hurry to get away from the weirdos.

"No wait! I'm Nadia, this is Bee, Jen , Sam and Tori." Nadia said and pointed to each girl respectively.

"Well I'm Sirius, this is James, Remus, and Peter." Sirius pointed to each of the guys. Bee suddenly really saw Sirius and thought he was cute and started flirting with him.

"Why hello there...how are you today." Bee said flirtily while batting her eyelashes to Sirius.

"Sorry this is our physco friend we had to bring her or she would've killed another vampire." Jen said jokingly but not joking about the physco part.

"See look what happened to Bella." Bee joked too. Bee and Jen looked at each other and cracked a huge grin.

"Hi there." James said to Sam flirtatiously.

"You know you have a girlfriend right?" Remus said to James.

"Shut the fuck up!!!" James growled at Remus.

"Jen's type not Sam's." Nadia and Steph said at the same time.

"What?" James said confusedly.

"Sam's a goody two shoes and Jen's the cold one." Steph said matter of factly.

"ARe you really cold all the time?" asked Peter really curious.

"Yeah i'm usually 30 degrees all day long." Jen said sarcastically.

"REally??" Peter said surprised. Jen shook her head in disgust and thought, _Why does the dumb one show interest in me out of all the ugly guys?_

_"_So where are you guys from? Not around here because I know England people and they don't wear capes unless it's the new fashion. Tori said.

Just then Steph started freaking out.

"I missed a new fashion!!! NOOO" Steph shouted.

"No not really we just like to uhhh ummm..." Sirius didn't know how to finish the sentence.

"Make a new fashion statement." James finished for him and Sirius locked eyes with him telling him that he was grateful for the save.

"No offense" Steph said but she thought please take offense, "but capes are sooo 50s and 60s and you should get out of them if you want any girls." Steph finished.

"Where we come from girls like capes." James said proudly.

"What world do you come from? Planet dork?" Jen said nastily.

"JEN" Sam yelled

"Wat?" Jen said annoyingly.

"YOu no what!" Sam shouted. Jen just rolled her eyes.

"Ohhh Jen's getting in trouble from her mom!!" Bee said. Jen hit Bee for that comment and said, "Shut up!"

"owwww Mommy Jenny hit me!!" Bee whined to Sam. Sam glared and said, "Jen! and don't call me mommy!! I'm the same age as you." Jen glared at Bee while everyone else but those three tried to hold in their laughs.

Jen glared at the boys and asked snottily, "Do you have a problem with that?" The boys hastily answered, "NO."

"Don't worry she isn't nice to guys at first but..." Nadia started.

"She never gets better towards guys!" Steph cut in and finished."Yah." Tori agreed.

"Weelllll we all know that!" Bee said imitating Tori.

"Guys! She is nice to the boys too!" Nadia said trying to stick up for Jen.

"She isn't even nice to us how would she be nice to strangers?" Steph and Bee asked.

Meanwhile Jen got tired of the arguing and turned on her iPod and said , "childish people" under her breath.

"This is going to take a while." Sam whispered.

"Name one guy Jen has been nice too in the group we just met." Tori said to Nadia. Nadia looked at the guys and back at Jen, who was still listening to her iPod, and sighed, "Well ,,, ummm...." She couldn't finish.

"Exactly." Steph said with triumph laced in her tone. Finally Jen took some notice in the conversation and said, "You guys done yet cuz I'm hungry and I wanna go get some food."

"Yah me too." Bee agreed with Jen for once.

"Lets go." Sam said.

"Are you guys coming?" Steph asked the marauders.

"Leave them be they probably are going to some weird festival where there will be weird food like snails or something. " Jen said boredly.

"Hey !! I'm French!" Bee shouted.

"Exactly what I mean." Jen said and pointed to Bee, "Exhibit A!" then she pointed to the guys, "Exhibit B!"

" I agree with Jen. What if they don't have manners?" Tori asked concernedly. Bee and Nadia rolled their eyes.

"I don't care about manners I mean we drag Bee and she has absolutely no manners these guys can't get any worse." Jen said.

"Hey!" Bee said sounding like a deranged monkey.

"Yah we'll join you guys it sounds like fun." Sirius said.

"I bet you just wanna go for the girls." Peter told Sirius. Both Sirius and James said, " Yah!"

"I wouldn't be talking." REmus said to James.

"I have a girlfriend that you very much." James said to Remus.

"But has that ever stopped you from flirting before?" Sirius asked.

"Ummmm.....good point." James said with a smirk. The girls giggled.

Yah so guys I wrote this with Hurricane Rachel too so if you want you guys can send comments to her too if you want.... okay hope you guys liked it.


	2. Chapter 2 The Art of Perfectionism

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Harry Potter that is owned by Ms. JK Rowling. I only own the plot and the characters I made up ( Jen, Bridget, Nadia, Sam, and Tori.) By the way, Jen is based on me and Bridget is based on Hurricane Rachel. The peoples I made up are based on real people.

The group of girls and boys were walking along a very not seeable path when Tori's stomach grumbled. Again.

"Can we, like, hurry up? I'm really, really—" but Tori was joined by all of the girls in her next word.

"HUNGRY!"

"I think we know that already. We've been hearing your stomach for the last fifteen minutes," retorted Sirius.

"We haven't even been walking for fifteen minutes," Tori responded nastily, glaring at Sirius. "Are you kidding me? We've been walking for, like, four hours already! It's like I'm walking the path of life! Only it's trailed with thorns rather than roses, but still! If I fall into one and scratch myself, you boys will be sorry! OH THE AGONY!" cried Bee dramatically, making a big show of dragging her legs while she walked instead of picking them up.

"Shut up, Bee," Jen said, tired of Bee's and the others' complaints. Of course, she couldn't say it herself; she had been complaining too. Everyone had.

"Are you sure you know where we're going?" Nadia asked with a huff. She didn't trust them. They just looked so ratty!

"Of course we know! We've been to the forest a million times!" protested James as Remus rolled his eyes.

"What's the name of the forest called, anyway?" asked a now curious and interested Tori.

"The Forbidden Forest," the boys answered simultaneously. Immediately, they heard a burst of laughter from behind them. They turned around to see Bee, holding her stomach from laughing.

"You're JOKING! The for—for—forbidden forest??" she cried through laughs. "You're kidding. How original."

The boys gave her a weird look. But she didn't acknowledge it; she often got these looks.

"She's right. Nobody would name a forest the forbidden forest. I should know," Tori said matter-of-factly.

"All hail the genius!" Jen shouted sarcastically over the loud noise of the song "Apologize" blasting through her iPod headphones. Tori rolled her eyes. Just then, Bee tripped over Jen's foot. As it happened often, the girls ignored her. The boys snickered, except for Peter, who looked like he had to pee very badly and smiled as if Christmas had come early.

"Are you okay?" Remus managed to ask. Bee got up and inspected herself.

"What a stupid question to ask a fallen girl…and yeah, I'm fi—NO WAIT!" she shouted. The girls looked at her, alarmed.

"What?"

"I BROKE A NAIL!" Bee shouted. Tori snorted, Sam rolled her eyes and Jen smacked her palm to her forehead and Stephanie looked absolutely shocked. And angry?

"That…is soooo my line," Steph said. "Oh, and your shirt is crooked."

"No, it's not?"

"Yes, it is! See look!" Steph said, fixing Bee's shirt.

"No, it's not!"

Yes, it is!"

"Does it even matter?" interrupted Jen.

"YES! It throws everything off balance now! Thanks a lot!"

"Why am I stuck with these weirdoes?" Jen asked herself aloud.

"Because you loooooove us!" Tori said.

"I do?" Jen responded unenthusiastically.

"Well, yeah. Deep down inside, you're really a softy and love us all!" Tori exclaimed. Bee, frankly, was surprised she didn't say the line from Mean Girls: "I wish we could all just make a cake out of rainbows and smiles, and we could all eat it together and be happy!"

"Must be deep, deep, deep, deep down," Bee observed. She got a smack for that.

"We're here!" announced James, interrupting the girls' little fight. The girls looked up and immediately Bee started giggling.

"Is this appropriate?" she asked through her giggles. She got James and Sirius laughing too while the girls and Remus just rolled their eyes.

"The Broom Closet?" Tori read off the restaurant's name incredulously.

"The one and only," Remus replied; he was the only boy not laughing.

"Weird name for a restaurant," Jen said in her emo-ish way.

"Weird your parents haven't given you up for adoption yet," James muttered.

"Heard that."

The group entered the restaurant.

"Hello. Greetings. Bonjour. Hola. Aloha. Ni Hao. Ciao. And any other form of greeting that I did not mention," the waiter said, holding the door open for them to enter. "Welcome to the Broom Closet." Bee stifled a snigger.

"Um, hey," Jen said casually.

"May I take your orders?" the man, now deemed Bobby (by Bee and Jen), asked as he led them to their table and they sat down.

"You may," Sam said to Bobby.

"Hey, loosen up, Sam," Jen leaned over and whispered. Nadia smirked and Tori refrained from snickering.

"What?" Sam asked innocently. Jen huffed.

"Oh, never mind."

"We would like four glasses of pumpkin juice," James ordered cockily, grinning at the girls.

"EEEEEWWWWW!" all of the girls, minus Bee, shouted. Bee grinned.

"Can I have Pumpkin juice mixed with lemonade and cranberry juice, please? Kaythanks," Bee ordered.

"I would like a coffee," Jen ordered.

"And some vitamin water, please?" Sam said quickly.

"Frappuccino," Tori said immediately.

"Make that two," Nadia said.

"Oh, me too! Make it three!" Steph said, smiling.

"Yes, alright," the waiter mumbled, writing on his hand and then left. Five minutes later, he returned with the drinks. Everybody graciouslty took theirs, except when it landed on the table in front of Steph.

"What is that?" she asked, furiously disgusted.

"It's your frappuccino, miss," Bobby said politely.

"This is not a frappuccino," Steph insisted. "What's wrong with it. Can you tell me? Tell me what's wrong with it."

"Is there a problem?" Bobby asked, now thoroughly confused.

"Well, DUH!"

"No need to shout, Miss. I shall get it taken care of if you refrain from shouting. If you will calmly explain to me the problem…" Bobby offered. Stephanie was practically hyperventilating.

"MY FRAPPACINO HAS ONE OUNCE TOO MUCH SUGAR AND HALF AN OUNZE TOO MUCH WHIPPED CREAM. AND IT SHOULD HAVE A CHERRY ON TOP!" she screamed. She was shaking angrily.

"Miss, how would you know if it has 'too much' of anything without trying it?" Bobby asked.

"Bad idea," Bee mumbled and Jen and Tori nodded, smirking.

"Perfectionist," Nadia mumbled to the boys, and was elbowed in the ribs by a grinning Sam.

"I DEMAND a refund!!!"

"Ma'am if you would just try it--!"

"I thought customers were always first!" Sam exclaimed, thinking out loud. Bee and Jen smirked.

"Shut it, pipsqueak!"

"Try your damned frappuccino!"

"But it has too much--!"

"Zip it, kid!"

"Let's just go, then!" Steph said. "It's clear this thing doesn't appreciate my cool perfectionism."

And they all left the Broom Closet, whether that sounds right or wrong. But on the way out, Steph shared her thoughts.

"By the way, Bobby," she said, putting emphasis on the name she had heard Bee and Jen call him. Bee and Jen burst out laughing. "You're pants don't match your shirt!"

"Oooohhh, disssss!" Bee hissed.

"Oh, and, your zipper's unzipped," Jen added offhandedly.

"Hah. Toodles, Bobby. Have fun getting paid two knuts per hour!" Bee shouted after him, and then girls and boys immediately burst out laughing when they turned the corner.

Yah so guys I wrote this with Hurricane Rachel too so if you want you guys can send comments to her too if you want.... okay hope you guys liked it.


	3. Chapter 3 Monologues

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot and the characters I made up. Go see Hurricane Rachel's account but of course you're not going to so just enjoy.

Chapter 3

"I'm hungry!" Bee whined. She was holding her stomach and over exaggerating.

"Me Too!" Sirius said.

"I'm not." Tori said in a snotty way.

"Me too." Remus agreed giving Tori googly eyes.

"HOW CAN YOU NOT BE HUNGRY!!" Sirius and Bee said simultaneously.

"Because…" Tori started but didn't finish because Nadia butted in.

"Oh no." Nadia said. "Here we go." Jen said rolling her eyes.

"What's going on?" Remus asked confused.

"Tori's about to begin a long and boring and weird and did I mention boring monologue." Steph said exasperated.

"OH! I love monologues!" Remus said excitedly.

"Geek much?" Steph mumbled.

"STEPHANIE!" Sam shouted.

"I know Remus has feelings too even if he's a total geek." Steph said mocking Sam. Sam obviously didn't get the mockery and thought that Steph was sincere.

"At least you're picking up some of my kindness. Unlike some others." Sam said looking directly at Jen and Nadia. In the distance Jen was chasing Nadia in circles.

"Nadia GIMMIE BACK MY GUM!!" Jen yelled while running at the same time.

"You're an addict and I love gum and you won't give me any so NO WAY JOSE!!" Nadia yelled back. Just then Jen got an idea and stood still. Nadia didn't notice and just kept running in the same circle. When Nadia came near Jen, she looked back to see if Jen was chasing her. Then Jen stuck out her foot and Nadia tripped.

"As you can see I'm not affecting many people." Sam said while Steph was pretending to be asleep.

"Steph, steph, STEPH!!" Sam yelled into Steph's ear.

"I'm awake...God!. No need to shout! Steph said and then under her breath she said, "It seems like Tori's monologues are rubbing off on Sam. " Jen overheard and laughed.

"It seems like I'm rubbing off on you." Jen said to Steph. Steph just glared.

"Is anyone listening?" Tori asked.

"No." Everyone said except Remus.

"I am." Remus said timidly.

"See someone's listening to me!"

"Tori you need to be less smart." Nadia replied back.

"I don't think I can do that." She said every word dripping with sarcasm.

"You could try." Nadia said matching Tori's tone.

"You can't lose your smartness, you can forget it but..." Nadia pretended to snore. Tori saw and got mad. She hit Nadia.

"Hey!" Nadia exclaimed.

"I guess I'm rubbing my bitchyness on Tori and Steph!" Jen said with a big grin. Just then Jen got hit simultaneously by Steph, Sam and Tori.

"GeeZ!!! I didn't do anything wrong!

"You think that just because I slapped someone that means I'm a bitch!" Tori yelled.

"Well....kinda? is that the right answer because I can always change it to no." Jen said quickly.

"Jen, sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you." Tori said.

"Sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you." Jen mumbled. Tori slapped Jen.

"I'll shut up."

"Good. ANyways back to my monologue." Everyone but REmus groaned. Just then Jen's phone rang.

"It's Jen's phone." Nadia stated.

"Thank god for the bell." Jen replied getting a glare from Tori.

"I'll just take the phone over there." She said pointing to a corner. "and Leave." Tori nodded and started to monologue again. Jen grinned.

"But that's not fair...I mean I think that Jen should feel the education too!" Bee yelled. Everyone nodded their heads except for Tori and Jen.

"NO I INSIST THAT YOU START WITHOUT ME!" Jen panicked.

"I think Jen's right this one is long and I need too..." Tori started.

"Fine with me." Jen then ran to her corner. Then Tori started talking and Jen stuck her tongue out at the group.

"So anyway's I'm not hungry...the trick is to..." Tori started and went on and one.

James, Sirius, and Bee were snoring. Nadia was daydreaming. Sam was trying to bay attention but it got to boring and she started to get sleepy. Steph was looking for her phone. Peter was picking at his nails and REmus was listening intently.

In the distance Jen was on the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Jen."

"OH hey Lu."

"Hey so I got lost in some creepy woods and I went into this restraunt and it seemed like you, tori, nadia, sam , Bee, and some guys were sitting in the booth two away from mine."

"Did you see us get thrown out and the waiter yelling at a girl with dirty blonde brownish hair?"

"Yep."

"That was us.."

"Cool where are you? I wanna meet up with you guys." Lu said.

"Well from the diner." and she gave Lu the directions to where they were. Then Jen went back to the group and sat next to Bee and James.

"What took you so long? Mommy and Daddy called??." Bee said sarcastically. Jen slapped Bee really hard on the back of her head. All the guys looked at them but the girls don't care b/c this happens regularly.

"NO Lu called." Jen retorted. " She apparently was at the diner when we got kicked out and she's going to meet up with us."

"Cool! When's she gonna be here?" Bee whispered.

"IN a couple of minutes so how's the monologue?"

"Boring as usual."

"I know how to stop it." Jen said.

"Go for it." Then Jen went behind Tori and ticked her. Tori started laughing so hard.

"Stoooooppppp *laugh* iiittt,,,,,JJJEEEENEnnnNNN!!!" Tori said while giggling.

"She wont stop until you promise you'll end this monologue." Nadia said.

"Fi...nnnnenennenene." Tori said while laughing.

"Finally." Steph said and then she sighed.

"You guys are soooo mean." Sam said.

"You know you were tortured by the monologue too!." Nadia said.

"HEy!" Tori yelled. Sam looked down ashamed.

Sorry I didn't post really busy past couple of weeks....FINALS...


	4. Chapter 4 FOOD!

Disclaimer: dont own anything yada yada yada

"Okay, I am NOT emo!!" Jen shouted for what seemed like the billionth time that day.

"Yes, you arrrreeeee," sang Steph annoyingly. Jen scoffed.

"Name ONE thing about me that's emo," she challenged.

"I can name more than one," Steph started, "You always wear black and or red, your side bangs are CONSTANTLY in your eyes, and you always are fingering your BLACK guitar pick necklace." Steph smirked.

"That is NOT emo," Jen protested. Nadia raised her eyebrows, joining the conversation randomly.

"Is too," she said.

"She's right, you know," Tori chimed in. Obviously, nobody stopped to think that this was a pointless conversation, except for Bee, Sirius, James, Remus and (sorta) Peter, who were talking about food and its "heavenly wonders."

"Shut up, Tori!" snapped Jen. "We don't have time for another one of your monologues!"

"Ugh! Why don't YOU shut up, Jen! You're the one always being a bitch!" retorted Tori, now clearly annoyed.

"Well, she was right about the monologue thing," mumbled Steph quietly, causing Sam to attempt (and fail miserably) at holding back giggles. Jen rolled her eyes.

"Whatever."

"I don't think Jen's emo," James cut in, leaving the heated conversation on whether cookies were better than cupcakes. "I mean, she wears black, but so what?"

"You SEE?" snapped Jen. "I am NOT emo!" She was looking smug. Nadia glared at James.

"Way to go," she scoffed. "Way to encourage her! GO JAMES!"

"Oops," said James with a guilty little smirk. Sam sighed.

"I'm hungry," complained Sam in a whiny tone.

"ME TOO!" shouted Bee and Sirius simultaneously.

"Well, hurry up, or we'll miss the feast," Peter said. Bee was awed. So this guy COULD speak!! IT'S A MIRACLE!

"I think your stomach spoke for you," Tori said sarcastically, obviously referring to the loud growl that came from Peter's stomach shortly after.

"Damn! Who knew you could be a bitch like Jen?" Bee asked, clearly impressed with a sarcastic Tori.

"She's a bitch, AND she's smart!" James shouted.

"Well done, Einstein!" Bee shouted back.

"She's a smitch!" Peter shouted, laughing immediately after. Nobody else joined in the laughter.

"Whoa there, Peter. You just insulted the girl, AND you're an idiot!" noted Jen.

"He should get an award," said Bee.

"Maybe you guys should—" started Sam, but she was cut off by Stephanie.

"We know your speech, Sam. You don't have to repeat it."

"I will anyway!"

"WAIT A SECOND!" shouted Stephanie suddenly. "Did Peter say feast?"

"Feast?"

"Feast?"

"Feast?"

"FOOD?" shouted Bee, ruining the pattern.

"Oh, way to be fast, you guys!" Sirius shouted. Bee glared as he high fived James, who said,

"nice, man."

"Yeah, I did, now let's hurry up," Peter reasoned.

"Pushy, pushy!" Nadia muttered, earning herself a disapproving look from Sam, who was clearly trying to kee her straight face.

"Here we are!" Remus shouted a short while later.

"Whoaa!" shouted Bee, stretching the "oaa" to sound like three syllables.

"Wow."

"Wow! This is bigger than Nadia's place!" observed Jen.

"Does Nadia have a nice place?" asked James curiously.

"Good?" asked Nadia. She scoffed. "MY parents have a mansion in Beverly Hills. We have four bedrooms, six guest rooms, eight full bathrooms, two master bathrooms, two half bathrooms, an indoor AND outdoor pool, two tennis courts, and a gym. I'd hardly call that good. I'd call that the best," she boasted confidently.

"She's an heiress to a major company," Sam whispered in explanation to the boys.

"Ohh…"

"Can we just GO IN THERE?" asked Jen impatiently.

"Seriously," said Bee, struggling to maintain a straight face. "Come…ON!" She, Sam and Steph broke out in laughs as they recounted a rather short—but amusing—memory.

"Where's the kitchen again?" asked Bee, a mischievous glint in her eye as she smiled in a trying-to-be-innocent-but- not-succeeding smile.

"By the way," asked Tori, "whose place is this?"

The boys merely snickered at the obvious stupidity of the question.

"It's HOGWARTS," said Remus in his duhhh-everybody-knows-that tone.

"Oh," said Bee sarcastically, "EVERYBODY knows that! I mean…DUHH." She rolled her eyes at the stupid answer.

"Well, as you can clearly see it, you guys are witches," said Sirius conversationally.

"Well," started Bee, "TO THE KITCHENS!" She pointed ahead and started to walk forward.

"Pssst! Padfoot!" James whispered.

"Yes, Prongs?" Sirius whispered back.

"She's going the wrong way!"

"Let her go," interrupted Jen, linking arms with Tori and walking away to what Remus pointed out was the Great Hall while Sirius and James ran to quickly grab Bee and steer her the right way. Bee laughed nervously.

"Whoopsies."


	5. Chapter 5 Sorting Hat

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything...whatever just read**

Everyone in the castle going to the Great Hall for the feast. Tori was giving an explanation about moving pictures to try to hide the fact that they were magic. She still didn't get that her friends were witches too.

"You see it's just and illusion. Like those cards that you move at one angle and you see one image and as soon as you move it again you see a different one. This is much more complex physics of cours....." and she went on and on.

The guys who knew the pictures were moving by magic were slightly amused. Everyone then walked into the Great Hall to find the sorting hat singing.

"You're in good hands (though I have non)

for, I 'm a sorting hat

here for you and sooo..." It sang. Sam giggled at the sight of Tori, Nadia, and Bee's faces. Jen leaned over to the marauders and whispered, "That hat gets worse every year."

"So you've been here before." James said.

"No but I'm always a witness cuz my mom has connections."

"ohh." James said. All of the girls got into the first year line and then they realized that all of them were witches. The boys saw their faces and started cracking up. Then the guys sat down at the Gryffindor table. Just than professor Magonigall started calling out names.

"Ameaz, Anastasia!" Nadia went up to the chair and sat under the hat.

"...Yes...I see kind, sweet...GRYFFINDOR!!" The boys cheered with the Great Hall.

"Grant, Stephanie!"

"No doubt about this one....kind gentle...GRYFFINDOR!!" Steph skipped down to the Gryffindor table and sat next to Nadia.

"Heart, Samantha!" Sam slowly went up to the hat and sat on the stool.

"I could do this with my eyes closed....GRYFFINDOR!!" Sam let out a huge sigh and went to sit next to Sirius.

"Kim, Jennifer!" Jen walked up to the stool ignoring the jeers her friends were making.

"Go JENNY !! YOU GO!!!!" They all said to piss Jen off. Jen's temper broke.

"SHUT it!" She yelled. Everyone in the great hall laughed.

"Umm...feisty, sarcastic, mean, hummm... SLYTHERIN!!" The sorting hat yelled. Jen smirked and went to sit next to a long blond haired boy. The other Gryffindor girls were sad.

"Ram, Victoria!" Tori ran up to the stool and was bouncing up and down.

"...Smart but can be mean... SLYTHERIN!!" Tori ran to sit next to Jen and they high fived each other. The mauraders booed.

"Last but not least, SANDLER, BRIDGET!" Bee walked up to the hat with an attitude causing Jen to burst out into laughter and everyone to stare at her.

"Ummm...Kind yet sarcastic...hard one....GRYFFINDOR!!" the sorting hat yelled. The Gryffindors yelled with joy while Jen and Tori booed Bee down.

Then Professor Dumbledore came up to the post and started speaking.

"Settle down, settle down, AS I know most of you are probably hungry." His eyes flickered to the girls and the mauraders.

"I have but tow words to say to you...Tuck in!" Let the feast begin!" The food showed up and the girls and guys ate like pigs.

At the Slytherin table the guy with the long hair named Luicius Malfory was talking to Jen and Tori.

"So why are you pretty girls hanging around the Gryffindors?" Jen glared at him.

"They happen to be our friends and you should back off or i'll hit you hard."

"Violence at a wizarding school...tough." Malfoy said snickering.

"You know your hair's really nice." Tori said sarcastically.

"Really?" Malfoy asked hopefully.

"No and I bet Jen could pulverize you in less than a minute." Tori said quickly. Malfoy's mouth dropped open and Jen smirked.

"You no that was Malfoy,his dad owns like the whole wizarding ministry?" A random guy asked the girls while laughing.

"Do you think I give a damn about parents?" Jen retorted. The random guy glared and asked Tori, " What's with her?"

Tori smiled and said, "She's always like that" and she shrugged her shoulders.

At the Gryffindor table they were enjoying the meal. Bee was stuffing her face.

"THIS IS AMAZING!!" Bee said during mouthfuls of food.

"It's like Heaven." Sam agreed. The girls nodded their mouths too full to talk.

"Heaven is with girls." James said and the guys and Bee burst out into laughter. Nadia hit James in the back of his head causing him to choke. Everyone laughed.

"Pig." Bee said laughing.


	6. Chapter 6 Jamesey and Lily

Disclaimer: I don't own anything...i hate these things

"Ohhhhhh mah God, I am STUFFED!" said Bee. Sirius laughed.

"You DID eat a lot, Bee. You ate like a raccoon." Bee was in between glaring, looking worried for Sirius, laughing, and being confused.

"You're one to talk, Sirius," she retorted.

"I'd classify her eating habits as more of a piggy way of eating," Nadia decided, butting in on the conversation.

"No, raccoon."

"Pig."

"Raccoon."

"Pig!"

"Raccoon!"

"If you guys are DONE deciding how piggishly or raccoonishly I eat!" shouted Bee, making up two words unsurely.

"Ahh, children," James said cockily, tripping oh-so-elegantly on somebody's foot.

"Sorry, Lily!" he shohuted, sounding sincere. She just glared.

"Leave me ALONE, Potter!"

"Ouch," Bee said, beginning the peanut gallery.

"That's gotta hurt," joined Steph, snickering at James and Lily's glares.

"Way to absolutely CRUSH the male ego," commented Bee again.

"Whatever. I don't want to see you or your...fan club...again, Potter. Get away from me," said Lily while glaring her most menacing glare. Steph, Nadia, Sam, and Bee howled with laughter.

"Fan club, oh boy, you sure know how to hurt peoples' feelings," Bee said. She pretended to wipe off a tear. "I'm going to go crawl into a corner and cry. You guys going to cry with me?"

"Ouch! I feel...SOOOOO...hurt, Lily. How could you DO this to me?" asked Steph, joining Bee in a corner, where they shook with silent laughter.

"I feel betrayed," chimed Nadia, struggling to maintain a straight face while Sam snickered. Lily left after that.

"So, James," started Bee, "what do you see in her?" James looked first guilty and then taken aback.

"Why would you think I like her?" he asked weakly. Bee and Steph raised their eyebrows.

"Other than 'it's obvious,' you were drooling," said Nadia. Always the direct one.

"Yeah, you call US children. At least we can make a move," Bee taunted, smirking slightly.

"I do NOT like her," James claimed.

"Yess *cough* yeahedoes *cough*," coughed out Sirius obviously.

"Bless you, Sirius," joked Bee while he thanked her. Sam laughed.

"Seems somebody is in deniiiallllll," said Sam tauntingly.

"Jamesy has a giiirrrrllllfriend, Jamesy has a giiirrrrllllfriend!" sang Bee.

"JAMES AND LILLLLY SITTING IN A TREE," started Nadia and Steph. The rest of the girls joined in, smirking.

"K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes LOOOOVE; then comes MARRIAGEEE; then comes the BABY IN THE BABY CARRIAGE!"

"Whoa there, buddy," said Sirius, laughing along with Remus and (sorta) Peter. "Slow down there, boy."

James glared.

"I like that," said Sirius, laughing. "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

"Stoooppppp," begged James.

"You know you wannnntttt tooooooo," sang Bee and Remus.

"True, true," noted Nadia while Sam and Steph literally rolled on the floor laughing. And just then, Lily made her way back to them, glaring at the girls, James and Sirius and smiling at Remus.

"Did somebody say my name over here, Remus?" she asked in a falsely sweet voice.

"Pttshhh, NO!" said James at exactly the same time that Sam said, "oh yeah, we were planning your and James' wedding! Can I be the flower girl?" Bee and Sam cracked up while Steph snickered and Nadia gave them concerned looks. Lily glared at them.

"Did you put a laughing charm on them, Potter?" she asked coldly. He cowered.

"I-I would n-never!" he said, thinking 'good idea, Lily!'

"Ughhh whatever!" she said and stomped up to girls' dormitories. Bee was livid.

"We have to share a DORMITORY with her?" she ranted angrily. "Can I, like, sleep in you guys' room?"

"I bet she's going for Sirius," whispered Steph to Nadia.

"Three sickles says Remus," Nadia whispered back, clasping a bag of jingling coins. Bee shot them annoyed looks.

"Ugh, nevermind. It might seem," she cleared her throat, "different, than it really is."

"Yeah, no kidding," Sam said, laughing. James cleared his throat.

"You idiots! Now she thinks you were laughing at her!" he shouted, pointing up the stairs to the girls' dorms.

"Well," said Sam thoughtfully. "We kind of were." She got a smack in the back of the head for that.

"You're not supposed to hit girls!" she complained, rubbing her head.

"You're not girls," he said, looking at the four.

"You're right, James" said Bee, to the astonishment of the others. "We're WOMEN!" The girls immediately burst out laughing while Sirius and Remus chuckled, Peter peed, and James glowered.

"Now I'll NEVER get that date with Lily," he complained, his head in his hands.

"James, go to Jen," suggested Sam. "Believe it or not, she's kind of good at playing matchmaker!"

"Oh, I know! We played it during history once on a notecard, and—" said Bee enthusiastically.

"Nobody cares, Bee," said Nadia in a monotone.

"Ouch. Way to crush the male ego!" James shouted.

"Not funny, James," said Bee. "Keep trying, though."

--

"Right this way, ladies," said Malfoy in his slick voice that reminded Jen and Tori about a nail on a blackboard.

"Says the girl," muttered Tori.

"I knowwww!!" shouted Jen happily.

"Welcome to Hogwarts, ladies," said a greasy black haired boy. "I'm Severus Snape."

"Ew!" squealed Tori. "I don't want grease on my robes!" Jen busted out laughing before high fiving Tori.

"Nice one, Tori!"

"Thanks, Jen."

"Anytime," said Jen. "So, tell me...Snape. Do you have fries that come with your hair?"

"And is your brain a fryer too?" snickered Tori, laughing immediately after.

"Tori...that wasn't funny," said Jen. "Sorry, but it wasn't!" she claimed when she got slapped.

"I see these girls DO belong in Slytherin," said Malfoy with what the girls assumed was supposed to be "authority."

"Actually, we're muggleborn," said Tori without thinking.

"Damn right we are!" said Jen, high fiving Tori yet again. Snape cleared his throat.

"Oh yeah. I'll take a burger with fries. Not too much grease on the fries though," Jen added, eyeing Snape's very greasy hair.

Jen and Tori heard a shriek of laughter behind them. When they turned around, they saw two girls; one with black hair and an unintentional haughty look about her and the other with a blond, silky sort of look. The second looked fragile, as if she could have been blown away by a slightly strong gust of wind.

"I'm Bellatrix Black, and this is my sister, Narcissa," the black haired girl introduced.

"You DO belong in Slytherin," added the girl named Narcissa.

"Why thank you," said Tori, taking a bow.

"Wenches," muttered Snape under his breath, catching the attention of Tori.

"Whoa!" she exclaimed suddenly. "It seems our vicious Slytherin can't say a cuss word!"

"Mudblood," he said. "See? I just said one!"

"As if," inruded Jen, "Say a real one. Bitch! Ass! Shit, I need Bee here to help."

"Biiiiiiiiscuit?" Snape said pathetically.

"Say it," said Tori. "Out loud." And then she and Jen laughed, earning worried looks from passersby.

"Biiiitten!" Snape said, sighing in defeat.

"Paaaaaathetic," said Tori, mimicking his voice and then sighing in mock-defeat.

It was going to be a long year...


	7. Chapter 7 Quidditch

Disclaimer: I don't own anything J.K Rowling does....blah blah blah go read hurricane Rachel's story but i know you won't so oh well.

"Gooooooood MOOOOOOOOORRRRRINNNNNNNNGGGGG sleepyheads!" Bee shouted. It was a Saturday and 7 in the morning.

"BRIDGET!!" Sam whined from under her covers.

"Bridget Alexandra Sandler..." Nadia said sleepily trying to make her voice sound authoritative.

"Yes Nad?" Bee asked hyperly.

"Go jump in a hole." Nadia said.

"Someone's not a morning person." Bee said in a singy songy voice.

"You can tell?" Nadia said sarcastically.

"You're becoming more like Jen everyday."

"Nooo." Nadia said sarcastically.

"As you can see my phycology report on how kids are sooo cranky in the morning is finished! Exhibit A!" Bee pointed to Nadia.

"Shut up BEE!!" and then Nadia threw a pillow at her. Bee fell.

"Ouchhhh....care about me much?"

"Bridget go away no one likes you." Sam said. Bee gasped.

"Sam the goody two shoes just insulted me!"

"I'm mean in the mornings now do what Nadia says!!" Sam yelled.

"What? To go jump in a hole?" Bee asked cocking her head to one side.

"Yes! Now go away." Steph said.

"But Sirius and James told me that there are Quidditch tryouts today and nnnnndddd I'm trying out for beater! ARE YOU GUYS DYING OF EXCITEMENT??" Bee said and she had jumped up into the air with her arms flung all over the place like a cheerleader at the annnnnnd.

"I am sooo excited that I'm going to act dead by sleeping." Nadia mumbled.

"Lol." Sam and Steph grumbled still under the covers.

"Someone isn't a morning person..." Bee said in a motherly voice.

"I know."

"Come ONNNN! Sam's gonna try out for chaser, and Steph and Nad can try out too....and fail." Bee whispered the last part.

The other girls heard but didn't care they were too tired. They just wined.

"Fine you asked for it." Then Bee walked over to the bathroom got a bucket of water and poured it on each of their heads.

"Up yet?"

"NOOO." the girls said sarcastically.

____________________________________________

Bellatrix went into Tori's and Jen's room at 7:10 am and poured water on them as a good morning present.

"Good Morning!"

"HEY!!" Tori yelled.

"What?"

"MY beauty sleep."Jen rolled her eyes.

"Did you know that these matresses are a bitch?" Jen asked.

"Oh we know! By the way Quidditch tryouts are today."

"YOu trying out?" Tori asked to Bellatrix.

"You are crazy!!" Then she walked out cackling.

"REally freaky laugh" Tori said.

"I've heard worse."

"Who?"

"Steph!" Tori cracked up.

___________________

AT the Quidditch court Gryffindor and Slytherin were doing tryouts together for some odd reason. Tori and Jen were randomly walking and talking.

"So what are you trying out for?" Jen asked.

"Umm...probably beater everything else is borrrr....ing!!" Tori said and faked a yawn.

"Oh well I'm trying out for seeker!"

"...." Tori just looked at Jen.

"What?" Jen said.

"Nothing."

"Tori!!!" Jen whined

Just then the marauders and the other Gryffindor girls were walking towards them.

"Hey Gryffindor peoples!! You miss me yet?" Jen said running up to them.

"Yes!" Steph said and then hugged her while whispering in Jen's ear, " Bee is getting so annoying without anyone to crush her!"

"I heard that Steph." Bee said annoyed.

"Steph no hug for me?" Tori said with a puppy dog face.

"Of course....i was getting to you." Steph said.

"YOu know what just don't talk to me." Tori said mocking Steph.

"TOOORRRRIIII!" Steph whined.

"Joking!"

"So what are you guys up too?" Nadia asked.

"Well me and Tori killed a guy's self confidence and now he is the loser of Slytherin." Jen said casually while Sam looked disapprovingly at her.

"Plus we made fun of everyone else too!" Sam's stare turned to Tori.

"So everyone in Slytherin hates you guys now?" Sam said.

"No! We are actually accepted there!" Jen said and Sam's eyebrows rose.

"Me and Jen finally found teh world where we can be bitches in and be accepted....it's nice.." Tori said then laughed. Everyone laughed with her too.

"Anyone of you girls trying out for Quidditch?" Sirius asked.

"DUH!!" Tori yelled at Sirius.

"What are you guys trying out for?" James asked.

"Beater!" Tori and Bee said at the same time.

"OH the joy of Bee being a beater....she'll probably hit the ball wrong and it'll hit the shit out of someone and this will be Bee." Jen said then she puts a sorry face on and said in a sweet voice mocking Bee, "SORRY did i do that?" and then Jen fake laughs. Then in her normal voice she said, "Then she'll fall off the broom."

Everyone but Bee laughed at the imitation.

"What if that doesn't happen?" Bee challenged.

"Then in the middle of the game you'll hit the ball wrong and it'll go after you and then you'll be running about from a ball" Jen said

"Ball..." Bee said and laughed.

"BEEE!!!" Sam reprimanded.

"You are so perverted." Nadia said.

"You just noticed?" Tori asked.

" I only knew her for 2 days and I even knew that." Sirius said not noticing the sarcasm.

Nadia sighed.


	8. Chapter 8 Quidditch Tryouts

Disclaimer: Don't own anything but my characters.

**WARNING: LOTS OF CUSSING IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE...JUST SKIP OVER THE PART**

"Alright then," James started to explain quidditch to the girls that morning at the breakfast table, with Sirius at his aid. Peter was practically pissing his pants from excitement (even though he's heard this many, many, *many* times before) and Remus was sitting on the bench reading, knowing that if he wanted he could probably repeat James' speech word for word from hearing it so often.

"The Seeker," James introduced.

"-flies around trying to catch the Snitch," Sirius interrupted.

"-which is a tiny golden ball-oh quit laughing, Bee, it's not that funny-that flies around quickly." James ended with an annoyed look at Sirius and Bee, who were doubled over laughing.

"The Keeper keeps Chasers from the opposite team from scoring goals. There are two Beaters. What they do is-"

"try to hit the shit out of people who try to score," Sirius and Jen interrupted simultaneously as Peter started squealing like a five-year-old, earning eye-rolls from Tori and Steph, annoyed glares from Sam and Jen, and a palm to the forehead from Bee, along with an unseen eye-roll from Remus, and two disgraced glares from both Sirius and James.

"Lastly, there are the Chasers. There are three of them. They have to throw the balls through the hoops," James continued, ignoring Sirius, Bee and Remus (who was actually laughing at the look of annoyance on James' face) who were all snickering.

"More like *hits* the balls into the hoop," corrected Bee, doing a pretty good job of holding in her laughter while she leaned against the wall, clutching her sides, from laughing so hard.

Jen and Steph rolled their eyes and said simultaneously,

"NO COMMENT, BEE."

"GOOD! I didn't ask for it anyways." Bee pointed out while the girls braced themselves and the boys looked around confused, minus Peter, who looked as if he was on his way to a movie premier.

Jen shook her head slightly and took out her iPod, which she had somehow managed to get to work, and turned on the song "So What" by Pink. Bee soon joined in humming along to the beginning of the song, earning a few worried looks from passersby.

"Her mind is blank. Nothing new, though. Just

something to get used to," Tori said matter-of-factly to the boys, earning a death glare from Bee, three amused looks, and one overly-excited-seizure-nervous-peeing-my-pants sort of look from Peter (surprise, surprise. He's supposed to be fourteen?!).

"Oh, HA FRICKEN HA. That is SOOOO funny, Tori,"

Bee said nastily and sarcastically, losing her peacefulness. "Go become a comedian!" Bee said without laughing for once, but everybody could tell she was sarcastic.

"Whoa! Is Bee PMSing?!" Steph whispered to

Nadia, who giggled, and Sam, who looked over with a stern look.

"JUST FULL OF JOKES TODAY AREN'T YOU?! Now, just

SHUT THE HELL UP AND START THE FRICKEN TRYOUTS ALREADY!" she screamed to James and Sirius, who immediately tried to look as if they had been preparing the whole time.

"Yeah, well, we'll be in the you

guys on.?" Nadia and Remus said in a questioning sort of way.

"Okay," James said happily, until he realized that Jen and Tori were still with them.

"You guys? Why are you still with us? You're in

*Slytherin*," he added, putting emphasis on the last word.

"All the houses are having practices together, except Gryffindor and Slytherin planned it at the same time," Tori explained, amused by the look of horror of James' face as he and Sirius took in what she was saying

word-by-word.

Finally, the group made it to the pitch, which was now crowded by tryouters (that's not a word, is it?) and their supporters, and James and Sirius' group of fangirls, whom Bee laughed at shamelessly.

"Oh, if only I had a brain!" Bee cried, wiping an imaginary tear and pretending to fawn all over Sirius, who merely closed his eyes and attempted to control his annoyance, which was now aimed at the whole group, all of whom were laughing pretty hard as Bee switched her target to James, who smiled, amused, when she pretended to faint as he passed. Bee was now being joined by Nadia and Tori, and was being called lame by Jen.

Finally, the group heard the Slytherin captain, Doug Flint, shout, "ALL PEOPLE WHO ARE TRYING FOR SEEKER, LINE UP OVER HERE!" He pointed to a region of the field. He did the same with Keeper, Chaser and Beater before finally shutting up.

"That's you, Jen," James said stupidly, as if Jen didn't know she had even decided to try out.

"Go FAIL, JENNYYYYY!" Bee said, smirking, as she

emphasized Jen's nickname. Jen's hate of the name was apparent on her face as she said, "Go jump in a hole, Bee."

"Dammit! That's the second-no wait-THIRD time

somebody's told me to go'jump in a hole,' whatever that means."

"Well, it is you."

"Bitch."

"Slut."

"Whore."

"Hoe."

"Ass."

"GUYS SHUT THE HELL UP! AND JEN, GO TRYOUT FOR

MERLIN'S SAKE!" Sirius shouted, causing some giggling girls behind him to jump. Bee and Jen just smirked, looked at each other, shrugged and then continued.

"Bitch."

"Slut."

"Whore."

"Hoe."

"Ass."

"Tryouts are starting now," James said casually, making the girls stop bickering, turn around and salute.

"Yes'm," the two girls said simultaneously.

"'Yes'm?!' I am a MAN, and a PROUD ONE at that!" James shouted, earning himself a clap on the back from Bee right before she steered him facing her

and said, "You just keep thinking that, Jamie."

It went downhill from there. Then the group had a good

laugh at the sight of Sam, who was still having a spaz attack from 'over-use of cuss words' that had happened about five minutes earlier.

"....*twitch*.cuss.*twitch*.words."

"Oh, get over it! No point dwelling over 'over-use of cuss words'," Steph said, annoyed, emphasizing greatly "over-use of cuss words."

"What got stuck up *your* ass? You're not even

trying out!" Jen shouted, clearly very annoyed, even though she should have been use to it by now.

"Bitch, .GO EAT A DONUT!" Bee finished with great enthusiasm at her new 'insult.'

"What?" the whole rest of the group asked simultaneously, with a couple of passersby joining them in their question.

"."

"."

"What? I missed breakfast this morning!" Bee

claimed, only to be contradicted by Steph and Sirius.

"You couldn't miss breakfast. You would have

passed out by now if you hadn't eaten breakfast, knowing you."

" you did eat *five* , actually, you more like stuffed them in your mouth and swallowed them whole." Sirius added thoughtfully.

"I learned from the best," Bee muttered darkly as she glared at Sirius.

"What's your point anyway?"

"Nevermind. Tryouts are starting right this second, Jen. Go try out or you'll miss your chance!"

"What do I do, then?" Jen asked rudely to Flint

when she got to the line of try-out Seekers.

"Fly around and try to catch a little gold ball,"

Flint said, equally rude.

"Mkay."

So Jen flew around and eventually got bored from just flying around avoiding big spheres that were flying towards her. So she took out her iPod and started listening to some Jen-like song by Paramore.

Down at a lower elevation, however (A/N: I TOTALLY got that line from my physics teacher!!! YAY!!!), Tori and Bee were planning on how to make Jen angry while she was up in the sky.

"I know exactly what to do!" Tori said evilly,

grinning.

"Alright, but don't do anything-"

At that moment, Tori performed a very good Expelliarmus on Jen, whose iPod came flying down. Jen automatically screamed "AAAH!! MY iPOD!" and soared

down to catch it. Which she did.

"-stupid." Finished Bee bitterly, glaring at

Tori, who looked disappointed at what the Slytherin Captain said.

"Jen. Seeker. Now." Flint said to another guy

on the team, who was recording open options for each position. "Yes, sir," the guy said and he

wrote down Jen's name on the line placed for Seeker.

Then it was Tori's turn to try out as Beater. She flew

up into the air with the club, anxiously looking for a good target to hit. She thought she'd bash on that dopey looking guy with glasses underneath her.

~Perfect.

Jamesie, here it comes!~ she thought, wickedly smiling as she flung the Bludger towards him, just as he dodged it by a half an inch, looking astonished that Tori could hit that hard. That's what

she said. Haha no.

Tori smiled and hit another one randomly, pleased to see she had knocked somebody off of his broom. When she was done, Flint smiled at her (it actually ended up as more of a grimace) and said to the guy writing stuff

down,

"Margo, are you getting this? Jen as Seeker,

Tori as Beater one, Loraina still as Chaser one, Vladamir as Chaser two, and , Keeper, Keeper...Igor as Keeper. Beater two is me, of course, and you are Chaser three. TRYOUTS ARE OVER!"

He shouted the last part to a few boos from the other tryouters (I JUST decided to make that a word) and they eventually stalked off to a) join in fawning over how 'hott Sirius looked when he did this! And ohmygosh James Potter was SOO looking at her yesterday in DADA!' or b) glaring at that 'bigheaded Potter and his sidekick, prettyboy Black.' Next up it was the

Gryffindors' turn to use the pitch. James and Sirius grew very excited as they helped Joseph Wood, the

team captain (OLIVER WOOD'S DADDY!) with the tryouts.

"ALRIGHT, EVERYONE! IF YOU'RE HERE TO TRY OUT FOR

SEEKER, LINE UP OVER THERE! CHASERS THERE, AND BEATERS OVER HERE!" Wood shouted as all the tryouters trooped to the line they were directed

to. Bee, Steph, and Sam stepped into their lines, Steph and Bee into the Beater line and Sam into the Chaser line.

"," Wood instructed to a blond girl in

the Chaser line who automatically blushed bright red and climbed onto the broom. Soon after she got on, though, she fell right off it. She apologized, laughing

uncontrollably with her friends, (who were also in the line might I add) and a few tries later, was forced to stop trying out.

This same thing happened twice more and eventually, fed up, Wood shouted so that the whole pitch could hear, "ALRIGHT! ENOUGH OF THIS B.S.! IF YOU'RE HERE TO TRY OUT, STAY IN LINE!" This wasn't well responded to. Wood was seen sighing as Steph, Bee and Sam laughed unashamedly at his frustration. He shot pleading looks

at James and Sirius, who immediately nodded at him and

rushed in front of him.

"IF YOU'RE HERE TO ADMIRE ANY OF US SEXY BEASTS,

JUST LEAVE!" Sirius ended lamely, while James struck a pose and Wood slammed his hand to his forehead.

The girls could hear Tori, Jen, Nadia and Remus sighing and laughing in the stands, and they could practically hear Peter squealing excitedly like a busy oompa loompa (I have no idea.) in the stands as James and Sirius both started striking different poses. Sirius' request was met. Almost all of the girls who had stood in line to "try out" had officially left the pitch and headed to stands, where they could giggle and fawn and coo as much as they wanted.

The boys on the team laughed a little as Wood, although he was smiling, shook his head and buried his face into his hands. When he had regained his

composure, he had different people try out for Keeper.

Then Seeker. Then the time finally came to try out for Beater tryouts.

"Bridget, right? You're up!" Wood shouted at

Bee as she grinned wickedly and ran to the broom she would use. Almost as soon as she got in the air,

she heard Jen shout, "IF YOU BURN THE PLACE DOWN OR

FALL, I WILL BE DOWN HERE LAUGHING MY ASS OFF!" The crowd laughed. Bee frowned.

"BITCH!"

"SLUT!"

The two girls were pretty much laughing hysterically by that point, until the Bludger came straight towards Bee. She grinned and got her bat ready.

".THREE!" Bee shouted childishly before

whacking her bat around, hitting the Bludger across the stands, knocking somebody

off her broom.

"SEE? I DID IT!" Even Bee seemed surprised that

she didn't hurt anything or anyone apart from the other quidditch player, who was now fine and back on her broom.

"WOW! THAT'S AMAZING! NOT!!" Jen shouted.

"JEE THANKS FOR THE NOTE OF SUPPO- UM OWWW WHAT THE

HELL!" Bee shouted as she flew straight into a pole as Jen shrieked with laughter. Bee frowned sourly and hit the next Bludger angrily, pretending it was a round rulebook with a one-size-fits-all book cover on it.

The Bludger flew madly across the pitch, knocking the same girl as earlier out.

"Whoops," was heard faintly from where Bee was

now standing, smiling crookedly at the damage she had made, James and Sirius surrounding her, grinning.

"Brilliant job, Bee!" James said happily.

"STEPH'S TURN!"

Steph did just about as well as a snail does in a snail race. When it loses. Big time. While gently holding the club, she examined her nails, a look of horror spreading on her face at some point.

Of course, the crowd thought she was referring to the Bludger heading straight for her, but nope.

Not Steph. Instead of screaming "AHH CRAZY BLUDGER SPHERICAL BALL THING CHASING ME! RAPE! RAPE!" she shouted

"AAAAH!!!! HEELPPPPP! I BORKE A NAIL AND NOW MY NAIL POLISH IS CHIPPED!" She heard a loud

"GOD FORBID" from Bee

down in the stands before getting hit by the Bludger. She fell off her broom, and stood up immediately.

"THAT'S IT! I OFFICIALLY HATE THOSE BLUDGERS!" she screamed with a tone of finality before

storming off.

"Honey you know you have to dodge the bludgers?" Jen shouted to Steph sarcastically. Steph just glared.

Then, soon enough, it was Sam's turn to try out as Chaser. She played very well scoring 9 out of 10 goals and impressing Wood very much.

When the tryouts ended, Wood duplicated the sheet of records (it held all this year's Gryffindor Quidditch Team players) and posted them to a wall so that people could take them. Bee ran down and snatched one, reading tentatively.

She read:

GRYFFINDOR QUIDDITCH TEAM

Bridget Sandler (Beater).year 4

Sirius Black (Beater).year 4

James Potter (Chaser).year 4

Samantha Smith (Chaser).year 4

Delilah Spinnet (Chaser).year 6

Joseph Wood (Keeper).year 6

Jordan Berns (Seeker).year 5

Unfortunately for Tori and Jen, even though they already knew they had made the team, Flint apparently was too stupid to think of just duplicating the

paper.

Yep, they had to wait until the next morning to find out who was on their team. The group of the boys and girls departed for the showers, where

Bee and Tori, who finished first, decided that since they would be playing on opposite teams, they should make the best of it.

"So, whenever we play against each other, we have to play tennis in the air, sort of. We'll just hit it back and forth to each other and back!" Bee

suggested, thinking up new ideas to amuse the crowd at

games.

"But what about the net?"

"Oh, the net is the players, Tori."

"Excellent."


	9. Chapter 9 Gossip

Disclaimer: I do not own anything blah blah blah

WARNING: CUSS WORDS USED A LOT...if you can't handle just skip.

"You fag." Jen said to Bee.

"Dickweed." Bee improvised.

"Bitch-face."

"Slut."

"Asshole!"

"Motherfucker!"

"What are you doing?" James asked incredulously.

"Saying all the cuss words we know," Jen said simply. James shook his head while Jen and Bee grinned.

"Do it alphabetically why don't you!" Nadia said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

Bee and Jen looked at each other and cracked a wide grin at the same time.

"PERFECT!"

"So.. I guess ass goes first..." Jen started.

"Then asshole." Bee said. They went on and on. Steph just sighed while Sirius looked amused and Peter looked like he was having a seizure and Nadia just ignored them. Sam, on the other hand, was twitching and said, "Have mercy!"

Everyone laughed having the same thought in mind, 'Sam is such a goody two shoes'.

"We're ruthless." Bee said. The laughing stopped suddenly, everybody stared at Bee, and there was an awkward silence.

"No," Jen said, and the two friends carried on.

"Dick, dickweed, dumbass." Bee said ignoring Jen and went back to the list.

"I'm guessing you've done this before." James said smirking.

"NOPE! only Concentration 69!" Bee chirped. Jen and Bee started playing.

"concentration," Jen said

"69," Bee screamed. She enjoyed that number

"More repeats--"

"No hesitations!"

"I'll go first."

"I'll go second."

"The topic is.."

"CUSS WORDS!!" Everyone just looked at them, shocked.

"We had older brothers." Jen and Bee said like it explained everything.

"Some twisted, twisted older brothers." Steph mumbled under her breath.

"What was that?" Tori said smirking.

"Nothing." Steph said, glaring at Tori.

"Girls....be nice don't start a catfight." Sam said watching both of them.

"Cat fight?" Tori and Steph said in unison. Then they both cracked up.

Everyone looked at them like they were crazy.

"And they say we're weird," Jen said.

"Yah I mean at least we're not buttheads," said Bee. Jen and Bee shrugged in unison.

"Concentration," clap, clap, clap, "69," clap, clap, clap…

_____

Dinner

"Where are Jen and Bee?" Remus asked while carefully putting corn on his plate.

"I wouldn't want to know," said Tori rolling her eyes.

"I do!" James said, making all the girls roll their eyes.

"We're HEEEE-ERRRRR!!!" Bee yelled.

"Damn," muttered Sirius.

"Love you too." Bee said and Jen blew a kiss to Sirius.

"Let's get in line for the special dinner." Jen said.

"Okay!!" They both went in line and stood right by each other. Of course they wanted to cause trouble, so Bee took out her phone and called Jen.

"HIGH BEE!!" Jen said into the phone.

"HEY WATS UP?" Bee yelled back even though they were right next to each other. The Great Hall went quiet trying to hear their conversation.

"Did you hear about Lily and Jamsey?" Jen said.

"You mean potter-butt and Lily bitch?" Bee said holding in laughter.

"Yep!" Jen said.

"What?"

"Let's just say they went into a certain closet and the next time they came out they were all sweaty and flustered and happy." Jen said with a smile.

Lily and James' mouths dropped open. Of course, these weren't true. Jen and Bee just wanted to make trouble. As usual.

"OH, I KNOW!" shouted Bee. "I never really expected them to go THAT far in fourth year…Jeez."

"Sick, right?"

"Totally! And what about blondie-Malfoy and Mr. Greasy? I mean EW!"

"Ew and what about ..."

"Longbottom and Steph!"

"ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING!"

"Oh and did you hear? Molly called Kate a bitch, and then Kate spread a rumor about Molly being pregnant and now Molly is mad, so she dunked Kate's head in a toilet!" Bee said happily.

"Oh wait! Dumbledore's calling me! Let's do a three-way!" said Bee happily. Then she connected with Dumbledore, too.

"Hello girls, maybe you should get off the phone." Dumbledore said.

"Oh hi! Uh, why?" Jen asked into the phone.

"Hey, Dumbles!" Bee said.

"So did you hear? We got detention!" Jen said.

"I know! From Minnie Mic-Jee!"

"Who?" Professor Dumbledore asked curiously. He honestly had no idea what they were talking about. And who wasz this 'Dunbles'? Hm…

"OH that's Professor McGonagall!" Jen said happily.

"A detention because we were playing concentration 69 in her class? Simply UNHEARD OF! UNACCEPTABLE!!!" Bee whined.

"The game was totally innocent!" Jen said, smirking.

"No...*cough* it's not*cough*" Sirius said.

" Shut up sweetie! We heard you laid Mary Sue Vange!" Bee shouted.

"Girls, I believe that is enough." Dumbledore said seriously.

"NO I didn't!" Sirius yelled back at Bee.

"THAT'S NOT WHAT MARY SUE SAID!" Bee and Jen both said. Mary Sue then proceeded to hide her head behind her hands while her friends looked at her jealously.

"AWW LOOK SHE'S BLUSHING!! LOOK AT THAT SHE LIKES YOU!!" Bee said, an evil grin widening by the second.

"GIRLS ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!" Dumbledore said.

"Okay, Dumbles." And then their line went dead and the whole great hall was staring at them. They just grinned.

"'Sup?" asked Bee nervously while Jen just snickered.

"Sit down, girls," said Dumbledore sternly. They saluted.

"Yes, sir!"

Author's note: Sorry I haven't posted in a while; didn't feel like writing and sorry if it isn't funny we've got writers block. And I'm also sorry if it is rushed because I'm kind of in a hurry right now. So just look for the next one; it'll be funnier. PROMISE! _Review._


	10. Chapter 10 Groupies and Hogsmade

disclaimer: i don't own anything except the characters i made up and the plot

"What's Hogsmade? Hey isn't that, like, a juice brand or something? asked Bee, excitedly jumping up and down at the mention of juice.

"I love juice!!" shouted Sirius, clapping his hands like a little child.

"I know right? IT'S **SOOO** good!" exclaimed Bee as she and Sirius launched into a conversation.

"Did you just say Jews?" Jen asked through her earphones which were blasting with Love Lockdown by Kanye West.

"Idiot, just don't talk." Nadia said.

"Okay...So What up?" Jen kept talking just to piss Nadia.

"Is there something wrong with Jews?" asked Bee, looking suspiciously at Jen.

"Well," considered Jen, "if they're all like you, then yes."

"You're funny." yelled Bee sarcastically before resuming conversation with Sirius.

"So it IS a juice company, huh?!" Bee said to James excitedly.

"No it's a place where you can relax and shop and.." James said not finishing.

"That's it?" Bee said a little fallen.

"And you can eat food." James finished.

**"FOOODDD!!!!"**Bee yelled, making everyone cover their ears except for Jen who was still listening to her iPod.

"Why didn't you say so?!" Bee continued, "I LOVE FOOD."

"Didn't you just have a 18 course lunch?" Jen asked turning her music down just a tiny bit.

"NO....I ate a 7 course lunch." Bee said holding her head up high.

"Like that makes a difference." Jen said.

**"IT SO DOESSSS!!!!!!!" **Bee whined at Jen.

"Calm down Bridget." said Nadia wisely. Bee and Steph looked at each other before saying , in unison, "Tame the animal within. Learn to control your emotion!." James and Sirius gasped.

"You sound like the divination teacher!" cried James frightened, he always was a little freaked out by the divination teacher.

"Your divination teacher meditates?" asked Tori.

"AWSOMENESS!!" shouted Jen,high fiving Bee at the mention of meditation.

Steph and Nadia shook their heads, they all knew what happened when Bee and Jen meditated.

"Why are you guys shaking your heads?" Sirius asked.

"Lets just say," Tori started retelling the flashback.

FLASH BACK

"So today we are going to meditate in class today." The yoga teacher said.

"Oh this will be so much fun." Jen said sarcastically.

"Why did we join this for our elective again?" Bee said.

"Because you guys wanted to be with us." Steph said.

"No that's not it." Jen said.

"No i think it was because you WERE BLACKMAILING ME!!" Bee yelled at Tori. Tori had threatened to send a really embarrassing picture to Bee's celebrity crush.

"Not for me, they bribed me with a pound." ( i really don't know how english money works.) Jen said smiling. "So hand over the money." Nadia, tori, steph and sam all handed her money which equaled a pound.

"YES MORE MONEY TO BUY MORE SONGS OFF OF ITUNES YAY!" Jen yelled, happy for once.

"Okay class, sit down and find your center, your inner core, your.."

"WE GET IT LADY!" Jen shouted.

"JUST find your center." the yoga teacher said.

Jen's center was a place only with music, music, americas best dance crew, music, converse, music and music. Bee's center was her trusty sneakers, writing, going crazy, and food, food, and more food. Both of the girls were so in their center that they decided to reenact their centers. Bee pretended to stuff food in her mouth and basically made two girls trip and knocked over a vase. Jen pretended to be dancing to music and made the yoga teacher trip and go to the hospital, and managed to almost push a girl out of a window. This was all in 80 seconds. When it was over, "LETS DO THAT AGAIN!!" Bee shouted.

END OF FLASH BACK

"Good times, good times." Bee said smiling.

"too bad we don't have divination." Tori said relieved. She didn't want to be the girl that went to the hospital if those two meditated.

________HOGSMADE___________________

"I can't believe you drank 5 butterbeers and ate 22 mini muffins." James said in awe.

"YOU ARE MY NEW HERO BEE!! " yelled a random weird kid who saw her eating all that.

"THANKS !! I LOVE THAT I AM APPRECIATED!! Bee yelled back.

"by the weird kid." Jen whispered which earned a hit from everyone in the group except for Peter.

"JEEZ!" Jen yelled rubbing her left arm where Bee, Steph and James had hit in the same spot.

Just then James spotted Lily.

"Time to ask Lily out." James said.

" SO YOU DO LIKE HER!" Steph yelled.

"Not so loudly." James said panicking.

"Oh so not like this," Jen started and Bee and jen at the same time yelled," _**SO DO YOU LIKE HER**_!!!!"

James' eyes almost fell out of his sockets. Lily had heard them and were walking towards them and lets just say James was hyperventilating, the girls were on the ground, that was covered with snow, laughing and Sirius and Remus were trying to hold in their laughs. Peter just look like he really had to go to the bathroom.

"Potter, tell your groupies to quiet it down." Lily said venomously.

"Groupies?" Jen said whispering to Bee. They started whispering and got an idea.

"So...soorry. Lily I mean i didn't mean to disturb you..i mean." James said getting nervous. meanwhile Jen and Bee conjured up a b boy hat and really baggy hoodies. They put the hoodies on and they put their hats on sideways. Then they walked up with attitude to Lily and James while everyone else was cracking up.

"Yo!" Jen said nodding her head.

"We're James' groupies." Bee said putting a hard core face on. Sirius conjured up the same thing and walked next to them.

"Yo, Lils tsup?" Sirius said. James was glaring at them because they were mocking Lily and the other girls were still laughing.

"IS THIS SOME SORT OF JOKE POTTER?" Lily screeched.

"No joke....homie." Bee said trying not to laugh. James then started to glare daggers at them.

"We'll just be ovr there. " Remus said dragging James' "groupies" away.

"REMY!!" Jen said.

"You were ruining James' chance."

"But it was funny we were just proving lily was right...being James' "groupies." " Bee said and Sirius and Jen doubled over laughing.

Meanwhile James was trying to get Lily to go out with him.

"Lily I am so sorry, I was just trying to I mean I was wondering if maybe you and I could maybe i don't no umm just kinda..." James said but before he could finish a snowball pelted his head and Lily's back.

"SNOWBALL FIGHT!!!" Jen and Bee shouting knowing well that they ruined James' chance. Then they started throwing snowballs at James and Lily hard and fast while laughing at the same , Tori, Nadia, Steph, and Sam joined in.

"IF THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF ASKING A GIRL OUT NICELY THEN NO " Lily shouted and walked away. James looked at them and started chasing after Lily.

"JAMES WAIT!" Jen said. James looked back and said, "WHAT?"

"YOU forgot your groupies!!" Bee said.


	11. Chapter 11 Lip Gloss Check

Disclaimer: I don't own anything blah blah okay moving on

**IMPORTANT NOTE: **_OKAY SO ME AND HURRICANE RACHEL ARE GETTING BORED OF WRITING THIS STORY SO WE'RE GONNA WRAP IT UP AND STOP IT _**AFTER ABOUT 2 -3 MORE CHAPTERS BUT NEVER FEAR THE SEQUAL IS COMING OUT. ITS GONNA BE IN THE HARRY POTTER ERA THIS TIME AND THE CHARACTERS ARE GONNA BE SORTA THE SAME BUT THIS STORY WILL BE WAY FUNNIER AND IT WILL HAVE SOME SAPPY FUNNY CRUSHES IN IT TOO SO LOOK OUT FOR THAT !!! **_**BTW REVEIW PLZ I MEAN I GET LIKE 450 HITS BUT LIKE NO REVIEWS SO COME ON REVIEW. **_

____________________________________________

"We should do that again!" Tori yelled.

"What? The embarrassing me in front of the Lily part? or the embarrassing me in front of Lily part?" James said sarcastically.

"Oh my gosh...ummm...." Steph said wondering.

"You have to think?!" James asked.

"WEll there is a big difference," said steph defensively.

"Yeah, I mean, either way...." James trailed off before storming up the Grand staircase and they could hear him scream, "STUPID HEAD!" loudly.

"Okay now that we know officially that James is a girl." Bee said.

"Why's that?" Nadia asked confused.

"Well Duh!" Bee started.

"He's PMSing." Jen finished. Then they high fived each other while grinning madly.

"Such .....wait." Tori said. "I can't say your a girl or boy." she finished.

"Oh haha your so FUNNY WHY DON'T YOU JUST BECOME A COMEDIAN HAHAHA." Bee yelled sarcastically.

"I told you she had anger management issues." Remus whispered to Sirius.

"I know right." Tori said.

"Your mom." Peter said speaking up for the first time in forever.

"O" said Steph.

"M" said Tori.

"F" said Jen who knew that the other girls didn't want the F there but oh well.

"Gee!!!!!" Sam said.

"IT CAN TALK!" Bee said pointing at the little guy, who always looked like he had to pee.

"We need to throw a party!!! IT SAID 2 SYLLABLES!!" Nadia said clapping her hands in nerd joy. Bee, Sirius, and Jen just shook their heads.

"Not funny." Sirius said.

"Hmph." Nadia said turning her head.

"Why is he saying your mom?" Jen asked the group.

"He thinks it'll become something big in the future." Sirius said rolling his eyes.

___________

2 weeks later it was time for the first Quidditch match, Gryffindor vs. Slytherin and lets just say Gryffindor was experiencing some difficulties.

"Come on PLWEASE, STEPH!!" Bee whined to Steph. It was 1 hour before the match and one of their chasers had come down with the wizard flu at the last minute and they needed a replacement, fast.

James and Sirius had tried to get Delilah Spinnet to play...lets just say it didn't go well.

Flash back.

"Delilah! You're not that sick. " Sirius said looking at Delilah who was in the hospital wing laying in bed.

"You're looking....pretty....ummmm...okay??" James said staring at the pale faced older girl who was sweating and had snot dripping out of her nose. Ew.

"REally guys?" Delilah asked hopefully. Then had a coughing fit into her hand.

"Yep....not really."

"No." They said at the same time.

"Guys, I" she coughed, "don't think I can go." she said.

"Come on don't be such a girl!" James said. Delilah just glared.

"I AM a girl." she said.

"Oops. Well your not that sick" he said ignoring the fact that her face was turning a pale yellow. Then he tried to pull her out of bed by her hand. Unfortunately, when you get the wizard flu, your temperature rose way above or below normal.

So when James touched Delilah's hand his fingers started smoking from her skin's burning heat. Sirius' and James' eyes became as big as divination balls.

"That's not normal." Sirius said to James. James then finally realized he was smoking, in the literal way, and was running in circles screaming, "MUMMY!!"

Sirius, not learning from his friend's mistake, decided to try to get Delilah out of bed and to the Quidditch field.

"Come on Dells! This is one of our most important game ever! WE NEED YOU!" Sirius said and then he held out his hand for Delilah to take. Unfortunately she took it and instead of her hand being scorching hot, it was freezing cold. His hand froze up immediately.

Sirius just stared at his hand.

"SO NOT NORMAL!" Sirius said to his self. Then ran in circles screaming, " MUMMY, DADDY!!!"

He was right behind James. It was quite the sight to see.

END OF FLASH BACK

"Steph please we need you to fill in for Delilah please!" Sam said. Bee was on the floor on her knees begging. James and Sirius were circling her legs like puppies and putting a puppy dog face on. Trying to make her say yes.

"Guys....GUYS!!" She yelled getting the boys attention.

"First of all I'm not a dog person, I like cats." She said. Then the boys looked at each other, shrugged, and started licking their hands, pretending they were paws and purring. Steph just rolled her eyes and continued.

"And SECOND! I already said yes to Joseph Wood...you know our captain."

Bee stood up looked at Steph and then started yelling.

"So you mean to say that i just learned how to beg for NOTHING?" Bee said.

"Kinda." Steph said. Bee just stormed off.

__________________

The crowd roared with enthusiasm. The game was about to begin and everyone wanted to see who was going to win. Nadia, Remus, and Peter were in the stands. Nadia reading a book, not into the game at all, Remus reading their advanced transfiguration book, and Peter saying your mom over and over again.

The Slytherin team came out with Flint in the front, Jen, Igor, and Margo backing him up and Tori, Loraina, and Vladamir behind them. Their green robes flowing with the strong wind.

Then the Gryffindor team came out with Joseph in the front, James and Sirius backing him up, and Steph, Sam, Jordan, and Bee behind them. While they were walking towards the Slytherin team, Jen stuck her tongue out at them in a playful way. Bee got distracted and tripped over her own feet, causing Jordan, Sam and Steph to trip and James' robe to rip slightly.

"Oopsies." Bee said. Jen was cracking up.

The game began within 10 minutes without Bee breaking anyone's bones. =D

The snitch was released and Jen looked for it, hoping to be the first one to catch it. Jordan, the Gryffindor seeker, looked around frantically for bludgers before looking for the golden snitch.

Joe, Joseph, was ordering Sirius and James to concentrate and was trying to not get any of the whizzing bludgers from hitting him. Sam was actually trying and so was Vladamir, Igor, Loraina, and Margo. On the other hand, James was making kissy faces at Lily and trying to show off his guns at the same time. Sirius was just posing for the girls in the audience and was showing off his flips on the broomstick. After a while the two very VERY shallow boys decided to concentrate. Bee and Tori on the other hand were in their own la la land. They indeed, like they had said to each other, were playing volleyball with the bludgers, using the people as nets.

"WATCH OUT JENNY!" Bee called, aiming a bludger at Jen. Jen ducked just at the right time.

"Thanks for telling me but I could've figured it out by my self thank you." She said.

"Jeez calm down Jenny!" Bee said laughing almost falling off her broom.

Steph was on the other side of the field and she was getting bored, so she took out her lip gloss. Realizing she didn't have a mirror, she called her friends over.

"JEN, BEE, SAM, TORI!!! PRONTO THERE'S AN EMERGENCY!!" She yelled. All of her friends were so caring that the literally stopped what they were doing and flew over to where Steph was. Tori and Bee dropped their bats and Sam dropped the Quaffle she was holding. They could hear their captains yelling at them from the background.

"WHATS WRONG???" Sam said freaking out.

"I DON'T HAVE A MIRROR TO PUT MY LIP GLOSS ON!!! I NEED YOU GUYS TO TELL ME IF I HAVE EXACTLY THE RIGHT AMOUNT ON." Steph said.

Bee and Jen looked at each other and started cracking up. This was so like Steph, calling them over just for a lip gloss check up in the middle of a Quidditch game. So typical.

"OMG u are sooo right!" Tori said and started saying how much she should've put on. Steph uncapped her lip gloss and started applying.

"You've got a little to little, wait no little more..."

"Yah almost there."

"The tiniest squirt more."

"There." They all coached her.

"PERFECT." They said in union after she was done. Just then Flint and Wood came over to where the girls were hovering and called a time out.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU GIRLS THINK YOU ARE DOING??" Flint yelled.

"DO YOU KNOW YOU ALMOST COST ME A GAME!!" Wood yelled at the girls.

"Take a chill pill Wood." Jen said rolling her eyes.

"Yah go jump in a hole Flint." Bee said.

"Do you finally know what that means?" Jen asked Bee.

"No but it sounds funny so I was just thinking....that" Bee got cut off by Wood.

"WHAT THE FUCK WHERE YOU GUYS DOING???"

"Oh we were doing a lip gloss check up." Tori said causually.

"A FUCKING WHAT?" Flint yelled.

"ARE YOU FUCKING DEAF??" Jen and Bee yelled.

"Its a lip gloss check up an emergency, Steph didn't have a mirror but needed to apply lip gloss so we had to come and help her apply!" Sam said in a know it all tone.

"DUH!" All the girls said. The captains looked pissed and the girls just flew away.

------------

**MPORTANT NOTE: **_OKAY SO ME AND HURRICANE RACHEL ARE GETTING BORED OF WRITING THIS STORY SO WE'RE GONNA WRAP IT UP AND STOP IT _**AFTER ABOUT 2 -3 MORE CHAPTERS BUT NEVER FEAR THE SEQUAL IS COMING OUT. ITS GONNA BE IN THE HARRY POTTER ERA THIS TIME AND THE CHARACTERS ARE GONNA BE SORTA THE SAME BUT THIS STORY WILL BE WAY FUNNIER AND IT WILL HAVE SOME SAPPY FUNNY CRUSHES IN IT TOO SO LOOK OUT FOR THAT !!! **_**BTW REVEIW PLZ I MEAN I GET LIKE 450 HITS BUT LIKE NO REVIEWS SO COME ON REVIEW. **_


	12. IMPORTANT READ

Disclaimer: I don't own anything...ya know how it goes XD

Author's Note: **So like I said me and Hurricane Rachel, my co writer, are getting bored of writing this story so we're moving on to this story's sequel but don't worry all your loved characters, Bee, Jen, etc.. , will be in it. Anyways I was supposed to do another 2 chapter of this story but again we really REALLY wanted to start the next story so here's it Epilogue. And the two chapters of the new story will be up tonight so go read and hope u guys aren't mad at me for ending it. Oh and review ...yeah.**

**OH AND PLZ PLZ PLZPLZPLZPLZ go on my profile and VOTE for your favorite character PLZ PLZPLZ**


	13. Chapter 12 Epilogue DaughtersUGH

Disclaimer: I don't own anything ....yah...okay moving on

Author's note: SEQUEL TO 14 GOING ON 5 IS OUT!!! YAH SO GO READ AND ENJOY THE EPILOGUE AND **REVIEW PLEASE!!**

plus i just put out my first poll seeing which character you like the best for all of my stories. I just wanted to see and i really don't care if no one votes but oh well and as my story continues and i put newer and newer characters in I will put those character on the poll too.

________________

Epilogue - 22 years later (They are all 36 years old now)

Phoebe Charlton scoffed at her friend's choice of suitcases, "Please Caroline, you you..." Phoebe said. She was in so much disgust at looking at Caroline's faded blue suitcase that she couldn't find the right insult.

"You dolt." Priya said smiling. She loved insulting Caroline, it was her job. Phoebe nodded at Priya in appreciation while Caroline just rolled her eyes. She was used to Priya and her insults.

"It's disgusting." Phoebe said still eyeing Caroline's suitcase.

"You're so weird..." said Caroline, shrugging and stretching out the word, "weird."

""Well she's right," said Prithvi Malta, joining the group and setting down her coach knock - off suitcase.

"Eww! Knock - off suitcase!" Shrieked Priya Ramsy as she hid her hands in her face, confusing her butler, Philippe, who accidentally dropped Priya's four Louis Vuitton suitcases.

"You're so mean, Priya." Swetha Martin said, even though she was laughing.

"Jeez, Rachy! What happened?!!" Swetha asked, always the concerned mother, to her friend who had just joined them, Rachel Laird. She was carrying a plastic dollar tree bag and a tiny packet of crackers.

"Parents.." she said in a monotone. The others nodded their heads with understanding while Caroline just burst into laughter. She was never the most sensitive one.

"Why are you panting?" asked Swetha, once again concerned. Rachel looked murderous.

"I said homicidal in the car and they kicked me out."

"oh."

"..."

"..."

"haha!!" Caroline said breaking the pattern.

"And this bag!" scoffed Priya, gesturing to Rachel's dollar tree bag, "it's worst than Caroline's!" She continued and then turned to stare at Caroline's bag.

" WHAT IS WRONG WITH IT !! I DONT GET IT!!" Caroline said to Priya looked confused.

"Yeah and what's wrong with mine?" asked Rachel, cradling the plastic Dollar Tree bag in her arms. Phoebe nearly died as she, Priya and Prithvi explained what was wrong with it all in one breath. Caroline merely put her headphones in her ears and listed to her iPod.

Jen Kim Cong walked towards her daughter, Caroline, with her husband Ryan and her older son, Darren. Much to everyone's disappointment Jen actually got married. When you compared them, mother and daughter, they both had the same black sleek hair with the catlike, black eyes and the button nose. Their personalities were the same too, sarcastic, dark humored, and didn't stand for anything weird or stupid when they loved being weird and stupid themselves. Ryan's personality was all in her older brother, Darren.

"JENNY!" Jen hid her face and turned around mad, "BEE! SHUT UP!!"

"Never lost your bitchyness, have you?" Bee asked laughing. She was arm and arm with her husband Drew.

"Honey why'd you jump out of the car?" Bee said mockingly to her daughter, Rachel. Bee was still the same. Unfortunately, Rachel had inherited most of Bee's qualities. They were both headstrong, had brown hair and eyes, mocking, and most of all they were loud.

Rachel just turned away. Just then Jen spotted Sam.

"HEY SHORTY!" She yelled to Sam calling her over. Caroline put her face in her hands, her mom was so embarrassing at times.

Sam walked over dragging her husband, Will, to where her friends were. Sam was Swetha's mom and they were both sweet, short, had carmel skin with brown eyes and pin straight black hair, were defensive, and very mother like.

"Jen! I got my growth spurt back in 6th year." Sam said crossing her arms.

"Really I didn't notice." Bee said which earned herself a slap from Tori, who had just joined them.

Tori had gotten married to Bob and had a younger daughter named Vanessa. Tori was Prithvi's mother and they were both uber smart, dark haired, had brown eyes and a light chocolate colored skin, and of course they were both sarcastic.

"Bee, ignorant much?" Tori said.

"All the time..." Rachel said under her breath. Caroline had to hold her laughter when all the other younger girls glared at her and her father looking down at her with disapproval.

"Maybe I shouldn't have chucked that pack of crackers at her." mused Bee, "but the cat instead."

"You have got to be kidding me." Steph said coming over with her husband Eugene and her older daughter Amanda. She was the mother of Phoebe, they were both light haired, light skinned, wide green/ hazel eyes, hard headed, loved to mock, and eat...but then again so did Bee and Rachel.

"I paid for all that family therapy and still you're throwing things at your daughter...STILL!" Nadia said joining the conversation with her husband Leopold - Chevalier, who was the richest wizard ever know to this earth and was a hug snob. So Nadia and Leopold were well suited. They had a younger daughter Leopoldina and their older daughter was Priya. Priya and Nadia both had caramel colored skin, dark, brown, and wide eyes, and were pretty short. Their personalities were the same too, mean, sarcastic, snobbish, smart, and REALLY mocking.

"It was a pack of CRACKERS, not like I threw the frying pan at her, like last time." Bee said. Rachel rolled her eyes at her mom causing Bee to glare at her only daughter.

"I can't believe this day came so fast." Sam said and hugged Swetha with her husband, Will. Steph had the about the same conversation with her daughter and so did Tori and Nadia. Bee and Jen had a little different way to handle their daughters leaving.

"Ugh... are you kidding? I thought this day would NEVER come!" exclaimed Jen thankfully.

"Actually," said Bee, "I thought Rachel here was a squib."

"You see?" whispered Rachel to Caroline, "I told you they thought I was the dumbest thing in the universe."

"Not the dumbest thing in the universe." Caroline started.

"Thank you." Rachel replied surprised that Caroline complemented someone.

"You're the dumbest thing on the Earth." Caroline finished earning a playful glare from Rachel and a high five from her brother Darren.

"OWW!" Caroline yelped when both her mom, Jen, and her dad, Ryan, hit her.

"WHAT DID I DO NOW?" Caroline said.

"Don't insult your friends." Steph said reprimanding her friend's daughter.

"Okay this is what you get two slytherins marry." Jen whispered to Rachel pointed to her parents, "you get a more sarcastic and meanish girl, which is me, and then when they should be proud of you being sarcastic, they hit you... " Caroline said shrugging and looking bewildered. Rachel snickered. Just then Bee came up to Rachel.

"Sweetie." Rachel glared at her mom. "We know you're mad at us."

"Ya think." RAchel mumbled really quietly.

"But we love you but if you get into Slytherin we'll kill you or at least disinherit you." Bee said. Then she quickly hugged her daughter and said in a chirpy voice, "Have fun!!" Rachel just stared at her mom, shook her head, and then headed off to the express where four of her friends were waiting.

"Some parents I have." She mumbled to herself.

"Okay, Caroline." Jen started. "Have fun, make fun of people, stay out of teacher's ways, oh and make sure you don't break the Slytherin line in our family, if you do, I will make sure your father and I will kill you." Jen said with a grin then kissed her child's cheeks lightly and said, "LOVE YOU!"

"Love you tooo..." Caroline said then under her breath she said, " that speech was so inspirational, not scary at all...nope not at all." Then she walked towards her friends.

They were all wondering what Hogwarts held for them to find out.

All 6 women, Jen, Bee, Nadia, Tori, Sam, and Steph watched the express leave and then they all turned to each other.

"GOD! I never thought they would leave." Bee and Jen said. They all laughed and left their other remaining children with their husbands and went to get a bite to eat. This was finally their free time and they were going to use it.

"So I heard Greasy head was their potions teacher." Tori said casually while all of them walked towards the exit.

"REALLY??" Steph exclaimed.

"Yep.. I feel bad for them." Nadia said.

"REally? Cuz I'm happy Mr. Greasy head's teaching them." Jen said.

"Why?" Nadia asked confused.

"So he can give them a hard time while we're gone." Jen said.

"Really think he's gonna give them a hard time just because of the things we did to him?" Bee asked. They all reminisced the memories they had of Greasy head(Snape), dunking him in the toilet, pushing him into the lake, spreading rumors that he was gay and transexual, magically photoshopping him and Lucius Malfoy together in a picture so they looked like they were kissing and then spreading it around the school, making his head turn into a monkey, tripping him, sending him to the office, making him sound like a cat when he talked to Lily.

"Yep I think he will." Jen said with a smile. They laughed agreeing with Jen. They still were the same even after all these years.


End file.
